The following is the first report from our science group, the Committee for the Promulgation of Scientifically Baseless Theories. The report briefly outlines a theory posed by my brother, who attempted to correlate the difference in height between himself and his friend with whether their moms bought their shoes a size too big or just right.
Theory: Children will grow into their shoes, as a goldfish will grow into its tank.
Corrollaries: 5'2" mothers can create 6'3" sons if she buys big shoes for them. If a parent wishes to stunt the growth of their child, the parent should buy the child small shoes.
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